I'll be honest, I was a bit disappointed when Matt said we'll just keep going to set the level (he put it way better than that)

but like what? Are you serious?

PJ is now encouraged to drink?

Isn't that the opposite of what we're supposed to be doing?? I wanted to PJ to stop drinking full stop – none of this manage it stuff.

But Matt encouraged me too, explaining anything and everything, whenever I had a question, Matt was there. (I don’t mean like 3am and I’m calling him for a chat or anything stupid but there was never anything off the table to ask and he always got back to me)

And so, we got going.

One of the early suggestions was ‘let's try drinking in the house’. At this point I was like great now I’m going to have to deal with him drunk in the house and watch him do it, but ok let’s try, what else have we got to lose?

But all of a sudden PJ getting 'drunk' wasn't an issue anymore. WTF?

I don’t even mean for him, like for me it was a trigger (I don't wanna sound like a snowflake but it's true)

Every time PJ would go out I'd be pacing the house unable to settle because, you know, he's going to come home and be all in your face and loud and just ‘drunk PJ’ (a bit of a gobshite not an aggressive drunk but still quite irritating, loved to start an argument and hard to deal with)

Anyway that went, away again WTF?

And it went away pretty quickly, although to be honest we had a shit tonne going on at the time so I didn't pay attention to when that stopped (sorry for being unhelpful and spoiler alert, expect that it’ll be ‘different for everyone’ because it is)

This was all happening at a time when our family was going through one of the hardest and more stressful things we’ve ever gone through and all of a sudden PJ’s drinking was no longer an issue

So where are we now? I honestly couldn't give a rat’s ass if PJ has a drink or not, I don't even ask anymore. If it seems like he's going to be out later I just leave the door unlocked (don't burgle me I’m poor) and leave him to just come in whenever, feeling rough the next day? sick bowl it is and my super duper hang over cure that’s actually awful, but kind of satisfying for some slight wife revenge (recipe available on request – you’re welcome)

There's no trigger at all for me now

And PJ? he's much more settled, seems to be excited about the future and been making plans. He's not the angry pissed off guy that he was14 (yes just 14!!) weeks ago, that hid in the pub and sulked a bit, made promises he couldn’t keep and then kicked himself for not keeping them. He’s back to getting excited about stuff and working on revamping old projects and working on new ones. He’s back to being my PJ – the guy I married

We've got a lot closer (I could go into detail but trust me you don’t want me to – let’s just say intimacy is easier and a lot more enjoyable – I’ve said too much already) and it's much easier to share stuff that might've been a bit uncomfortable before. We’re more open with each other because there’s not that looming worry that it might upset him or piss him off and he’ll go to the pub. The friction has gone. To me it feels like we're rock solid and ready for the next drama (and this time it won't be booze related - I don't think it ever will be again)

I’m so proud of PJ for how he’s done with Rethink Drink but it’s more than just what it’s done for him. I see the change with me too. I feel like a broken record but there’s no issues, no worries, no triggers with alcohol anymore, now I just get to complain at PJ about the normal wife stuff like ‘why can you never find anything?’

So basically if you're not sure, on the fence, will it work?, all that shit - just go for it. It's worth it (and no one pays me to say this stuff, I do it for free!)

Are you a wife, suspicious that this dodgy new guy on the internet is encouraging your alcoholic man to drink?

Don't sweat it - it's part of the process, just give him (your man) the space and support to go through this, you'll be thanking him and Matt later

Honestly I'm delighted that I get to write a review for this because it has literally changed my life and my marriage, not just PJ, not just drink

I guess to sum it up I’d ask you: how would it feel to not give a rats ass if your partner drank again or not?

If the answer to that is: it would be awful and he has to stop drinking now, then encourage your partner to keep going to AA and cross your fingers

If the answer is: that would be awesome, hit up Matt in a DM, trust me it’s worth it – this man knows what he’s talking about, it does work, he’s been through it himself and it won’t just change a relationship with alcohol.

The short version:

Rethink Drink didn’t just change how he drinks… it changed everything.

No triggers. No drama. No walking on eggshells.

Just my PJ back, our marriage stronger, and me finally free to moan about the usual wife stuff again.

If you’re on the fence - jump. It’s worth it.

Yes, he drinks sometimes. No, I don’t care anymore.

And no; Matt didn’t pay me to say this. (But I wouldn’t say no to a decent box of teabags, mate. My favourite is Yorkshire tea – just saying)